On the Value of Money

Max was role playing tonight as a motorist whose car had broken down (I was the mechanic)

Max: "My car is broken! The battery is dead, the headlights are broken and the bumper is dented. Can you fix it?"

Me: "Yes sir, I can, but it will cost you a lot of money"

Max: "That's ok, I have lots of money"

Me: "Ok then" (play fixing the imaginary car) "All fixed! That will be $1000"

Max: "Ok, here, I have five 10 dollar bills"

Me: "Well, that's not exactly $1000"

Max: "Oh, ok, then I have $1000!"

Oh Sweetheart

Max has had a random attachment to the word "sweetheart" this past week. Here are a few instances in which he has used it:

Me: "Max, please go to the bathroom before bed"
Max: "I don't have to"
Me: "Ok, let's go to the bathroom together"
Max: "Can we do that? Sit on the toilet next to each other like two sweethearts???"

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Pat: "Max, are you hungry?"
Max: "No"
(Pat makes a big sandwhich for lunch)
Max: "Daddy, did you make that sandwhich for us to share?"
Pat: "Yes I did"
Max: "Oh, you're such a sweatheart"

On Making Connections

Max: "Brooklyn, let's steal the fishes!"

Me: "Max, that's not nice! Do you know what it means to steal?"

Max: "No- all I know is that on Home Alone, the robbers steal things from the house"

(I found this fascinating- that he could not know what a word meant but make the exact right connection based on a movie he had seen)

The Elf on the Shelf

This post will only be relevant to parents who know what The Elf on the Shelf is; an elf who watches over the children (whose parents purchase him) and returns to the North Pole every night to report on that child's behaviour. This concept did not go over well with Max:

Me (after Max misbehaved): "Max, look at the elf on the shelf over there. Do you think Santa will be happy with your behaviour when the elf reports back to him tonight?"

Max (yelling): "I DON'T WANT HIM HERE!"

This was followed by Pat and I bursting into (soft) laughter as Max ran into the kitchen.

Later tonight when Pat was putting Max to bed:

Max: "Daddy, is the elf still here?"

Pat: "Yes Max, he only goes back to the North Pole once we are all sleeping"

Max: "Does Santa like wine?"

Pat: "No"

Max: "Coffee?"

Pat: "Yes, I think so"

Max:"Ok, let's give him coffee and vanilla yogurt when he comes to our house"

On Telling it like It Is

For the past few months, Pat has been growing his. Nothing too crazy or long '70's style, but not the clean-cut look we are accustomed to. 

Max: "Daddy, you look like a lady! Especially when you do this (flipping a longer front piece of Pat's hair). Or a peddler"

On Being Commanding

We had a big snowstorm last night and so Max ended up sleeping at his grand parents house. On the phone with me this morning:

Max: "Mommy I want to speak to Brooklyn"

Brooklyn: "Oh no! Awawa alla bzuphm (and other baby gibberish, yelled)"

Max (laughing): "Mommy she's talking funny! Where is Daddy?"

Me: "He's sleeping"

Max: "Wake him up please! Tell him he has a lot of shovelling to do!"

On Sleeping Habits

My trick when Max is getting difficult to put to bed and pulling 101 excuses is to remind him that I have to get back downstairs to finish the dishes and prep for the next day. Tonight he wasn't being difficult but I was really tired and put my head down for a second. Upon seeing me do that:

Max ( in an urgent voice) : "Mommy, go to bed! It's ok, Daddy can do the dishes. Really Mommy, go to bed!"

So Polite (sometimes)

While my mother-in-law was speaking to Max on the phone tonight:

Max: "Can I please speak to Grandpapa for a moment?"

Free styling

This is one of those posts that would be so much punchier if Blogger allowed the upload of video content. You'll have to imagine the following line sung loudly, in a 4 year old's French accented voice:

Max (to the tune of Hallelujah): "Glory, glory Halle-New York!"

On Being Observant

Upon seeing his grandfather coming back into our house minutes after having left:

Max: "Grandpapa, what did you forget?"

Grandpapa (laughing): "My keys"

Max: "Oh well that's ok, not a big deal at all Grandpapa!"

On Being Strong

Max is in a "I'm so strong/Feel my Big Muscles" phase. In the bath tonight, he re-enacted being a dolphin, diving into the water

Max: "I'm so strong! I can lift a pound!!!"
Me: "Wow!"
Max: "I know!